Will I miss Mama less?
No, you will miss her every day and as you get older even more. But she will be part of your life and live on in your heart. You will keep your promise to tell the world about Mama and you will tell your children about Mama. They will know her, just like you promised Mama.
Will the neck pains go away?
It will get worse at first but then a doctor finds a very small metal splitter that causes it. It will happen a few times more and it will always be unclear where those metal splitters are coming from and how they got in your body. The last one was removed 5 years ago and now you are fine.
Will I ever be good enough?
You will have fantastic grades. You will manage companies and create jobs, and you will even save lives. And then you will find your real passion and become really good at it. But all the time you keep thinking you are not good enough, and you surround yourself with people who tell you that you are not good enough. Until one day a friend tells you to watch her talk because she believes you need it. That is when you slowly start to realize that you are more than good enough, but you just keep telling yourself that you are not and listen to people who confirm that. Step by step you will learn to get out of your toxic circle and start believing in who you are. It was a very long journey, and I am proud of you. You should thank Melissa more often for not allowing you to escape!
Will I ever be loved by someone?
Oh yes! There will be a Princess, your Princess. Her name is Kaya, and she loves you with all her heart. Through all the ups and downs, she is right there with you, believing in you, showing you how much she loves you. Kaya is proud of you and wouldn’t want to spend a moment without you. Be the farther for her you never had. In case you haven’t noticed yet: you will be a father. I know you can not image that right now, but you will. It will be OK. You will be OK. I wish you would not be so hard on yourself.